Crumby People

Last Friday in Cube City, I attended a meeting in a conference room after a bunch of pigs had apparently slopped around in there. I was trying to concentrate on the meeting topic but found myself immersed in my disgust of the various cooties left behind on the conference room table, including but not limited to:

• Salt and/or sugar granules
• Bread crumbs from bagels, cookies, cakes, and Lord knows what else
• Greasy finger smears

I couldn't even place my laptop on the table without considerable grief. I even tried to wipe a section of the table clean with some left-behind napkins so that I could become one with the table, but salt and sugar granules are like white on rice. Good luck getting rid of them.

Why are people so crumby?