As if my troubles with Facebook aren't enough, I've got new drama with another networking site: LinkedIn. The Sniffer has found me on LinkedIn. It's really no surprise, as you must list your previous places of employment on LinkedIn in order to have the most success in finding past cube dwellers to add to your network.
A quite lengthy note accompanied The Sniffer's invitation to join her LinkedIn network. The most disturbing, yet simultaneously entertaining, part of her note was her opening statement: "I hope you remember me."
You. Have. Got. To. Be. Kidding. Me.
How could ANYONE forget The Sniffer?! She was insane! She was over the top!
I thought back to a cube dweller who found The Sniffer's insanity to be fascinating -- so much so, that he Googled her name after she'd been laid off from our Cube City and stumbled upon a fantastically insane find: The Sniffer's resume. The resume contained an undated photo that barely resembled The Sniffer. The photo was probably at least 15 years old. To make matters worse, The Sniffer had written an opening statement on her resume about how she'd been part of her previous employer's "bloodbath" of layoffs. Yes, BLOODBATH. There it was -- her true colors, splashing boldly across the page. I'm sure her choice of words on her resume won her a lot of points with prospective employers thereafter.
You know where this is going, cube dwellers. I couldn't help myself. When The Sniffer found me, I simply had to Google to see if I could find her infamous resume...and I DID! It's been at least 8 years since I worked with The Sniffer, and that same undated photo is still posted on her resume. I'm really not surprised about that. And I shouldn't be surprised at the updated commentary on her resume, but I am -- something about, "If you don't want to look stupid or careless, hire me." Seriously? Srsly. There's a shock factor with The Sniffer that I cannot articulate, let alone put into a perspective that makes sense to me. I wish I could make this stuff up, but the people in Cube City insist on writing it all for me!
This road trip down Memory Lane has been fun, but it has killed my shock absorbers. I won't be adding The Sniffer to my LinkedIn network.
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