Professional Suicide

I used to work in a very conservative Cube City where the conservative leaders tried to act like cool "A-list" people during the holiday season. They tried to have a very cool holiday party, but they usually fell flat with their robotic delivery.

One of the conservative cube dwellers, who would've bought anything that the robots tried to sell, was asking people what they were going to wear to the holiday party. When she got to me, I told her that I wouldn't be going to the holiday party.

Her loud, horrified gasping noise made everyone in Cube City stop what they were doing. As she tried to collect herself, I found myself really bored and ready for her to go away. Then she exclaimed, "You can't miss the holiday party! It's professional suicide!"

Right then and there, I knew I'd never attend another holiday party in Cube City...not that I had attended many in my lifetime before then. I just thought, "Wow. This lady takes herself and her career waaaaay too seriously."

It's been nine years since she made that remark about professional suicide. That particular Cube City has long since been out of business, but here I am, still working and still dissing the holiday party scene. I just figure I'm not getting paid to hang with cube dwellers, so why would I go to a party on a Saturday night with them? I wouldn't know them if we weren't spending the majority of our days totally miserable with each other as we try to earn a few beans.

So anyway, to my knowledge, I haven't yet committed professional suicide but have seen the death of many Cube Cities. I guess that's something to celebrate. Cheers.